About me, Michael, and this website....

 

I was born in 1982 and I am from the Czech Republic, Europe (so I really apologize for my English mistakes). I´m one of those who found Michael Jackson after he left this world. I knew him before, of course, but not much. I wasn´t his fan, I didn´t follow him. I remember that the first time that I heard about him was in school in the first half of 90´s. Some of my schoolmates were crazy about him. Actually, he was the reason that I asked my father to buy me my first record player – because these schoolmates were surprised that I didn´t have one. But I was more into books than into music then. I was very quiet, shy and thoughtful child living in my own imaginary world. I liked Michael as well, but at that time, I deeply fall in love with one music group (The Kelly Family – I still love them very much) whose concert I attended at the beggining of 1997 and it took all my heart... they help´ve helped me to find myself and gave me the ideals that I needed...

I somehow missed Michael´s concert in September 1996 that took place in my city! I really didn´t remember that it happened altought it was a really big event ( about 130 000 people attended the concert and the city literally collapsed). I knew some songs of Michael and I always enjoyed it when I heard them somewhere, but it never occured for me to buy any of MJ´s albums. I knew that they were called „Thriller“, „Bad“, „Dangerous“ or „Blood On The Dance Floor“, which altogether with his military style then wasn´t exactly my cup of coffee. I thought that this guy was a bit wild...

I just knew that he was somewhere on this Earth but I did´t care about him, because, to say the truth, he seemed to be too far and soooo great that I couldn´t reach him. I knew that he was unique but I thought that I have nothing common with him. I was so wrong!

I had no idea about what all he did in his life, about his musical brilliance and about his influence on art and on many other things. I also didn´t know how good and humble man he was, that he gave so much on charity, that there are thousands of people whom he helped, and that he featured many hidden messages for development of mankind. But I have to say I´m happy that I´ve never thought anything bad about him. He´s always seemed to be likeable, there was something about him what I´ve always loved. Of course that I heard some of those allegations and rumours about him, but I was satisfied with the answer I got – that he´s like a child, that he´s not able to hurt. I don´t know where I got these words but I easilly agreed with them – I was like that as well. I was like him and I have always been surrounded with these people - many of my friends were like that... playful and sensitive... - it was something absolutely normal for me. Actually, I didn´t believe that there are people, who are not like that. I was probably pretty naive because I thought that all people want to be happy in their lives and help the world as I wanted to. But I realized that many of them are mired in their own problems and are not interested in helping the others at all.

Recently, I heard this guy claiming that, for an adult, having roundabouts on the property and share it with someone else´s children is not normal and therefore it surely has to be something very bad. I consider any person with this view as unreasonably judgmental and biased due to the inability to expand their vision of the world beyond. Imagine how bad must be I when I still don´t miss any opportunity to swing on a seesaw on a public children´s playground and I love to hold children´s hands and hug them as often as I can? And how bad must be my husband when he still plays with the toy cars at home, built sandcastles with foreign people (young and old as well) on the beach and watches Disney cartoons before going to sleep? Well, we both love Disney cartoons very much. Sure, we watch dramas or porn as well but joy and delight from fairytales and moments of fun is somehow more permanent, you know? I just wanted to say, how sad is that, let me say, majority of people can´t accept purity of someone´s intentions as a real fact? Because there really exist quite a lot adults who can enjoy life just like a child.

Instead of recognition an opportunity to educate themselves, people assume things and judge from ignorance, without an effort to understand or empathize. It brings all the hate and incomprehension. Because how can you say something about someone when you even don´t give a deeper look to the facts and only repeat words that you hear somewhere? Everytime you try to understand someone, some affliction in the world can go away.

Interesting is, that nothing pushed me to find more about Michael. There were some moments when I remembered him and I said to myself that I would like to know what was he doing, but I didn´t search for him. 

That is why I would never imagined how much he can touch me until June 25th 2009. I remember what I was doing when he was dying. I went from my work and I was listening to my favourite songs like „In The Arms Of The Angel“ or „Love Is All“ on my headphones. It was evening here in my country and I had no clue on what was happening in L.A. at that time...

It was really, really weird feeling when, in the morning of the other day, I found out that Michael passed away. It was as if the world stopped. I said to myself: „Oh God, Michael Jackson? He wasn´t that old. Is it really true? It can´t be true. It just can´t be true. God, say it´s not true. What happened?“ I felt some kind of a void and it seemed to me unusual whereas I didn´t know him and I wasn´t his fan. I know the feeling of loss of my closest ones, but Michael Jackson was someone absolutely distant... I was quite okay first one or two days even when in shock. But then I felt that I need to remember him and I slowly started to watch his videos and read all informations about him that I could find. It´s not something that I automatically do when someone famous dies. I really don´t. Like when George Harrison passed away – and I love Beatles and George – I didn´t watch his videos or searched for his music at all. I just said to myself that it was sad. That was all. I was absolutely ok. But with Michael Jackson...

I started to cry. I mean really cry. Actually, I collapsed. I broke down to the ground several times a day and cried my eyes out. I wrote down and kept many things about him, many facts, many quotations, many stories. The more I got to know Michael, the more I loved him and the more I cried. I was in tears for hours, days, weeks, months... And then, he came into my dreams. I never experienced something like that before! I didn´t pay too much attention to my dreams before because I usually didn´t remember them at all. I didn´t have any dream about my mom after she passed away nor about my boyfriend when I was madly in love. But Michael Jackson was in my dreams EVERY SINGLE NIGHT for about one year and a half!!! Then it reduced a little and ended in summer 2011. To say the truth, I don´t remember what the dreams were about, I only know that Michael Jackson was there. I should probably wrote these dreams down but I didn´t do that. I didn´t feel there was an important message at that time, I rather felt that his energy was so strong that it manifested itself also this way.

I felt like I was pushed by some unidentified force those months after his passing. I was like obsessed. I couldn´t live normally. I went to bed much after midnight, slept very little (with a dream about him) and woke up early by desire to know more about Michael Jackson. I didn´t eat much and my household fall on my head. It was absolutely crazy and very exhausting. It all was possible because I had only a part time job for some time. 

I understood how it is to feel that urge, that desire to know something and to express it somehow. I felt like Michael had to felt it during all his life and I started to understand and admire him more. I even started to talk to him because I felt that he could hear me. From time to time I would say: „Please, give me a little break, slow down, I can´t hold it out.“ And I felt a little relieve but then it started again...

I was quite surprised when I found out that I wasn´t the only one who felt that. I encountered with stories of other people who had similar experiences. At that time, I realized that Michael´s death had greater impact on humanity than anybody else´s in historyMichael Jackson played a very important part in rise of a global consciousness. He did really much during his lifetime and it just culminated in his death. After Michael´s death there was something incredible going on. Many of us felt it. It probably never happened before and will never happen again. It was like the whole planet cried for Michael. Billion people did the same thing – intensively thought about Michael. And there was so much LOVE. The energy of crying people was so strong, that it affected everyone who was somehow open to it. And I believe it was able to change the energy of our planet! Not only from the spiritual sciences, but also and especially of quantum physics, we know that everything is interconnected and our consciousness can change the matter and the reality.

 

I have to say that it all was a really spiritual experience for me. I experienced it firsthand and that´s why I know that it was real. A fan´s words „Heaven seems to be much closer since you are there“ appeared to be true. I felt that physical and spiritual worlds somehow connected with grief and love that was almost tabgible. I stopped fearing death and found out that Michael Jackson had to have more power than I could ever imagine. I´ve been grateful that he has touched me that way. 

My husband almost left me at that time. He had his own problems and felt that I don´t care about him at all. I didn´t cook or clean up; when he talked to me, my mind was somewhere else, when he went to bed, I let him alone because I coudn´t left Michael´s videos and when he woke up, he found me reading a book about Michael. He felt lonely and was jealous, of course. Thank God we managed it and stayed together. Now, he slowly discovers Michael Jackson as well. And I experienced how it is hard for people, who feel that they have to do something, to have or keep a relationship. It´s so hard to have it all.

I worked at the cinema when „This Is It“ came to the theatres all over the world. In the premiere evening my manager said that there are two copies of the movie and asked me, if I would like to watch the second one, while the first one was being to screen in the other room to the regular visitors. As the staff we had possibilities like that, to see some movies before other people, to check the quality and notice contingent problems with screening. So I said „Yes, why not“ :-) I had already bought my ticket for the next day but this was a good chance to see it... So, I was sitting there in an empty room and then it started... I cried at the beggining, when the dancers and singers talked about Michael and how much they love and admire him. But then, I was just fascinated by Michael; the way he sang, the way he talked – and what he talked about..., the way he created show and the way he treated other people... It opened my heart wider and make my soul smile. It was just me and him and energy... When I left the theatre, I was happy because I was a victim of creative genius and so good, so humble and so lovely human being. I fall in love with him even more.

As I watched people leaving „This Is It“ the following days and weeks (the screening was extended due to hight attendance), many of them were taken out their cellphones and said to the persons on the other side something like: „It was beautiful, you have to see that as well.“ The others said among themselves: „I knew that“ or „I´ve always loved him“ and they had a bliss in their faces.. Everybody was touched. "This Is It" really brought a change to people´s minds all over the world. It was really great.

I had a blog called „Dance Of Life“ kiwi.pise.cz/ in my language (the name comes from a poem of Rabindranath Thakur but I found out that MJ has a poem of the same name...) where I tried to put some positive articles and pictures. From fall 2009, I started to write down things about Michael that I first gathered only for my personal use. I felt a need to share it with others and I saw that there is not enough informations about all aspects of his life and personality. One thing that convinced me about that was my colIeague from work who said that he cried a lot because of Michael´s death. He loved him, he was his idol but then he said that the only thing was that he should stay black. I was surprised and told him about his disease. My colleague was surprised too and also confused, because he heard about it for the first time. Do you understand a consequence of ignorance like that in global population?

Ignorance is very dangerous and usually leads to evil. As Sir William Osler said, the greater the ignorance the greater the dogmatism. Ignorance and dogmatism are killers of evolution of human consciousness. 

... Soon I felt that my blog is not enough and that is why I created a website www.michaeljacksonforever.cz (for Czech and Slovakian people) where I could put everything and preserve it in a form that I felt was useful. I wanted to have there only things that are true and that´s why I started to put there in fact only quotations with many pictures, videos and references. I had to translate great amount of articles from English into my language and it took me a lot of time. I honestly don´t know how I did it, I had to be in trance to managed it all. But it was worth it. People say that they love my pages and when I see that someone wrote down a nonsense in a discussion to an article, I simply put a reference to my wesite where I refer on that theme. Some people always check it out and if at least a few of them would change their mind, it all meet the purpose.  

It was in fall 2011 when I started to expand into this website. First I didn´t feel it was neccessary, because there were many beautiful websites about Michael Jackson. I sincerely thought that they were enough. I didn´t think that there was a need for another one and I was afraid to do it. But I still had this feeling inside of me and it was like a voice in my head trying to convince me to do it. I was arguing with that voice. (For the first time in my life, I felt that the voice wasn´t mine.) The voice finally won. I created also this English website. I don´t want to be a rival to the others. I just want it to be another site that shows truth and love. That´s what it is all about - truth and love and respect and education and maybe some kind of a tribute.

Back in the 2009, I started to ask „Who really was Michael Jackson?“ How is it possible for one man to make such an impact on the whole world and really change it? At the beginning there was his big talent, great teachers, his intelligence and perfect memory, and the fact that he was born in the right time into the right family. Well, let´s say that it might be a coincidence... If you make a research, you can find all those aspects, people, their views, books, and events that influenced Michael Jackson during his life and from what he drew... but there was something more inside of him, you know? He had that desire, urge, ambition... that is hard to learn somehow because it goes from a hidden place of ourselves and we are not sure where is its real source. I think that most of the artists and successful people somehow perceive that. But, during all his life, Michael confidently let himself to be led by the force that he only suspected. He felt what he had to do. He allowed himself to display his innermost essence and didn´t hide or disguise it. That is why he was unique and became bigger than all others. And, especially, that is why it is possible that he had so much love inside of him. You can´t be that loving person as he was only because you say to yourself that you´re going to be. You can´t pretend it for a long time. To have such love means that you live love, that you become love. You know who you really are, you know that you are a part of God and that God is all, you know that you consist of a pure light, you know that all is one in numerous forms, you know that you have the incessant connection with the source of whole creation and you know your own power to create. In this state you´re only able to serve and celebrate life. You know that all of life is in you. You feel that meaning of live is the life itself and that you are just supposted to live, rejoice and be happy. You have no obligations. But can you be really happy when there are suffering beings? If you are aware that all is one in a myriad of forms and therefore everything that you do or think sooner or later affects all the life - which is yourself - can you be indifferent? You can pretend that you don´t see suffering. Or you can claim that you have your own problems. Or, you can accept the reality as it is - just letting things be and love the world the way it is. But still, there is something deep inside of you, may it be an inner voice or a memory of your cells, something in your DNA, that says you that the world could be a better place but is disconnected from love and you have the desire to put in order, into the state that you maybe remember as the original bliss from which everything comes. You have the urge to heal.

I believe that Michael was born yet with this feeling and consciousness, although he had to discovered it again when people around him tried to separated him from his nature. He wasn´t the only one, of course not, but he was among the most powerful people in this matter.

As a human being he had his bad qualities, his fears, his weakness and his mistakes just like everybody else. We all are very similar. Our lives aren´t discussed by the whole world, but his was. How can someone be surprised that Michael longed for privacy? And when Michael tried to protect himself before the public, the media began to lie about him. Although those lies hurt him deeply and took his force, he just continued to give and continued to believe in human goodness. Before such a faith in humanity and the victory of love I bow deeply.

We should always remember that we are not entitled to judge. No one is here to judge the others. All we can do is to look honestly at ourselves, watch life and try to understand it. But many of us do not want to see the truth thay may seem to be hidden under hypocrisy and concealment of the real self. We are afraid of our inner feelings. We are afraid of opening our hearts wide. We are afraid that we won´t be loved. That´s it. It´s all about love.

You know, you can be a good person, you may want to give love and joy, but that doesn´t mean that you can handle it. (I wanted to help people but I was absolutely exhaused after three years of work with elderly people.) You may be famous and you may want to achieve something in your life or change the world somehow, but you may not find the right way to manage it. You can think you´ve really done something big and you may feel pride but it may not last for a long time. Will you still be prepared to do more? Even if other people will hate you and obstruct you? Michael Jackson achieved really many big things in his life. He was able to admit that he was unique but it never reduced his gratitude, humility, love and goodness and that fills me with admiration.

And what about his charisma and his energy? People around him described that they felt it and that it was strong. Michael Jackson touched others just with his presence, he even didn´t need to do something. He just emanated energy. How many people are like that?

I don´t know who he really was but I know that Michael Jackson was a spiritual being. Much more spiritual than we could imagine. He seemed to live in two worlds simultaneously and connect them through his art just as he expressed that he would wish to. He tried to give all that he received through this connection with higher source since the very early age. This is not a question of faith or religion, this is just a deep feeling that a person has inside. Religion can only help to name it or route it, but you have to experience it on your own.

This is the Mother Teresa´s Creed. I think that this captures Michael´s behavior perfectly:

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway.

 

Michael Jackson tried to make this world better. It was something he strived for since he was a child. He wanted people to be happy and loved making them happy with his music. He enjoyed attention and love he got, of course, but he always tried to draw attention to world problems. Many things turned to better thanks to him. Many people found their strenght and happiness thanks to him. 

One of his biggest messages is about children. It´s very important how much attention we pay to children, how much we love them, how much we listen to them... It´s because they can change the world. And it´s up to us if they´ll be able to lead balanced life based on loving memories from their childhood. This is really an important message and cannot be overlooked or even forgotten. There are many people who tried to point out on problems with children and today´s society, but Michael Jackson was the louddest one, the most visible one. Unfortunately, many people have thought that he´s been "only a superstar" and therefore he couldn´t show real concern also in a different field than they would expect. But he was so right with his reflections about our hidden inner child, about our fears from lack of love in childhood and about our taciturnity. I read some books on this topic and I heard some lectures but nothing of it left a prolonged impression on me. But thanks to Michael Jackson I started to feel it deep inside of me and I really started to live it. Because he lived it all his life. Now I´m not afraid to express my joy from trifles that make me happy. I understand why I enjoy life the way I do. And when I´m in presence of small children, I try to be like Michael and they just love me, they hug me, they say that they love me and want to hold me all the time. That is beautiful.

Michael wanted to be a great father and he surely was from what we can hear from his friends, family and his own children. The fate led to the fact that he had to leave this world when his eldest child started to growing up and his youngest child was seven years old. People say that all important things for a development of a child´s personality and demeanor are formed until the age of seven. What do you engraf to a small child is the most important thing because it´s the base of all future manners and the view on life in global. That´s why I do believe that his three chidren are the proof for all he wanted to say in his life about. He could only led them through their childhood. The kids could spend with him only limited time, but those were the most important years in development of human being. You always hear them say „My dad told me that“ or „My father raised me that way.“ It doesn´t matter what they will do profesionally in their lives but their personal behaviors will speak for themselves.

It´s as if Michael Jackson had all human qualities in him, including those that contradict each other. He was very good, gentle, kind, and humble man, but strong, powerfull and stubborn as well. He had big dreams and spectacular ideas that he followed directly but he felt fear as well. He was very shy but he enjoyed attention and wasn´t afraid to violate groovy ways. He spoke gently but everybody listen to him. He had something angelically pure inside of him while he exuded sexuality everywhere he went. He was so sensitive, that he often cry only at the mention of suffering but he also had a great sense of humor a loved to make a fun of people.

His appearance has blurred the conventional/traditional barriers surrounding gender, race and age in society. He could catch anyone and everybody could identify with at least a part of him.

He managed to unite the world that was still racially very divided at the time that he was born. In the second half of the 20th century, people slowly changed their views, but it was Michael Jackson - first with his brothers and alone later - who broke racial barriers through his music and unleash the true emotional storm. Whether it was planed from above or not, Michael Jackson made the whole world stand together and look into the same direction. He was the first black man that was admired and deeply loved by million representatives of all countries in the world. He broke racial barriers that were still present then and right after that he physically showed us that the colour of skin really doesn´t matter, because the essence of a human being is still the same.

I don´t want it to sound weird or it to be somehow missunderstood but now I can´t see Michael Jackson within the definition of any race or colour. It´s not easy to see him as black for me, because - although he was always very proud of his race - he didn´t look like that for a part of his life. But, of course, I don´t see him as white because he wasn´t. He´s above all that in my eyes. I see him as being that spiritually and physically exceeds and simultaneously connects all races and forms of human beings. It was not only that he strived for equality of all people during his life, but it´s like he embodied it.

The fact that Michael Jackson had a personal torment with the disease called vitiligo and with his nose from his growing up caused also the global consciousness on that matter. There couldn´t be a better test for people: can a different appearance of somebody change our attitude on that individual or it changes our attitude on the whole world? Altought Michael wished it all had stayed a personal matter, he put up the mirror to the society – how do you perceive Michael Jackson? Do you judge and slander, because someone looks a different way than you expect or wish to? Or do you have an open heart and see the unity within the difference?

We are all reflections of what the others wish to be. What we don´t like on others is what minds us... By loving or hating something we only define ourselves. 

Unconditional love comes from a higher source, while any spark of hate originates from our inner fear.

I had a hard time to understand that there are people who spread lies just because they WANT TO believe that they are true. For some of their personal reasons they haven´t ever tried to understand what Michael Jackson tried to say and do in his life.

It is really baffling that even when there are official documents, files and books showing Michael Jackson´s innocence available, still, there are people, who spread lies. Some of them do that from ignorance, some of them probably for fun, some of them because they aren´t able to understand - they don´t have an open heart and mind, they are bound with their own prejudices, and some of them just because they want to hate – maybe they don´t know anything else than hatred... maybe they never felt love and joy, maybe someone hurt them once or repeatedly and they can´t forget... maybe if they would try to listen, they would get what Michael tried to say about it.

Michael Jackson was kind, sensitive, compassionate, and loving man, who tried to give joy and used his great strenght for good - to heal and make the world a better place. He has helped thousands of people during his lifetime. 

Michael Jackson was funny and love to laugh. He knew that being happy is a natural state of human beings. Sometimes, when I think of him, I smile spontaneously and I feel that my body is flooding with joy. It´s that kind of joy which makes you really happy and you need to share it with others. You smile at them and they pass it on :-) 

Michael Jackson was a brilliant artist connected to fine spiritual energies, who tried to connect heaven and Earth, who very significantly altered contemporary music and distinctly pushed forward the whole music industry.

Michael Jackson was a hero. I admire him for every moment when he was down on his knees but he rose and went on. I think that he had to spent much time fighting with himself and grabbing all his energy and courage to go out, to show himself to the world - "Look, it´s me. I am here again. I still have something to show you. I have something to tell you."

Michael Jackson was the real varior of love and modern martyr. He had to die so that the world could understand it. But he won´t be forgotten. He will be remembered for his merits in many fields in future generations. 

Michael Jackson has taught me that altought love is all, there is never enough of it. So the best that I can do is to give love and not to be afraid to ask for it as well. Not to be afraid to be who I am and not toplay at someone who I am not. Listen, not to judge, love unconditionally, dream and not to be afraid to fullfil my dreams, go after them despite all the obstacles, live fully, not to be afraid to show the world my inner child and encourage others to do that as well with my example. Feel it and have fun.

He has opened my heart much wider and I realized that I am connected with all life much more than I used to be. Last year happened one thing that I am sure was possible especially because of my transformation with Michael´s love. My father passed away one night. I didn´t know it, because he was in a hospital and I was at home with a cell phone turned off. That night, me and my husband saw one of our electrical outlets burst into flame two times and a lamp started to shine (my father always loved to work with electricity...). I didn´t know what´s going on, but I didn´t pay to much attention to it. But that night I had a dream about my dad - I was standing next to his hospital bed, I took his hands and helped him get out of bed. First he was a little confused, but later he started to be happy. We talked a lot (he couldn´t talk for long weeks before his dead). Again, I don´t remember what was the theme of our conversation, but I remeber emotions. There was love and happiness. When I woke up in the morning, I felt so good, because I thought that he´s gonna be alright. Then I found out that he passed... and I didn´t know, whether I should cry or smile because of my dream. I felt that he was alright wherever he was, finally released from his pain. My experience was real and that´s why I am convinced that also my experience with Michael was and is real.

I´m happy that I´m a part of transformation that happens nowadays. I think that many of you feel it as well. Thank you Michael.

 

Namasté,

Kiwi